Mindfulness for Beginners

A fantastic meditation I did on the Chopra app recently was all about clarity. It was led by Devi Brown. Thank you Devi for presenting a metaphor for meditation that I think makes a ton of sense which I have shared with many clients and friends alike! I want you to picture taking a large mason jar down to a creek or lake. Take a big scoop out of the water gathering other items along the sides / bottom. Make sure it’s full to the top.

Now shake it up - probably looks something like this:

This is what our insides look like when we are not being mindful and caught up in our thoughts and emotions. The sticks can represent anxiety, leaves anger, sand can be fear, moss shame...whatever. When we’re all caught up in our “stuff” everything is stirred up and chaotic inside. And when there is chaos - how well can you see through the jar?? Not easily.

But, if we set the jar down to let it settle in it’s own time, what happens? We don’t have to do anything to the jar - just let it be and not touch it for a short while. Here’s the result:

How well can you see through the water now? Where is all the other junk in there? Settled calmly at the bottom. Just like what happens with you during meditation. It’s not about getting rid of the anxiety, fear, anger, shame, etc...those are all normal human emotions. But it’s about letting them settle down, rest and not cloud your vision so you can see what you need to do, take action with the activities and people that matter, understand your needs and desires. Without the cloudiness of emotional turmoil.

Our jars get stirred up all of the time. By our roommates, partners, kids, parents, co-workers, strangers, you name it! By cultivating a bit of mindfulness in your life, your ability to settle yourself and engage in a clear way with the values you hold dear increases tremendously. Doing this generates confidence, esteem, peace and joy. You are in charge of your emotions not the other way around. You can’t control when thoughts pop into your head or when someone else shakes your jar but can control how you respond. But it takes practice. It takes curiosity and commitment to learning new things. There is a great big world of woo-woo out there - some exercises you’ll be like “hell, no” some you think “hmm...maybe.” Then one will click and you’ll say “Yep, that’s my jam.”

A simple way to start is just a couple minutes of mindful breathing each morning. Slowly focus on inhaling to the count of four, pausing and exhaling to a count of six or seven. Repeating the words “in” and “out” as you focus your attention on the sensations of your body as you inhale and exhale - even five minutes can make a huge difference!

Go for it - I greatly encourage you to explore the world of mindfulness. Learn about how you already have all that you need inside of you to create the life you want. You just need to settle down and let clarity emerge!

Here is another exercise to try courtesy of Russ Harris, author and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy leader. Check out his wonderful book “The Happiness Trap” to learn more!

Mindfulness in Your Morning Routine

Pick an activity that constitutes part of your daily morning routine, such as brushing your teeth, shaving, or having a shower. When you do it, totally focus on what you are doing: the body movements, the taste, the touch, the smell, the sight, the sound etc.

For example, when you’re in the shower, notice the sounds of the water as it sprays out of the nozzle, and as it hits your body as it gurgles down the hole. Notice the temperature of the water, and the feel of it in your hair, and on your shoulders, and running down our legs. Notice the smell of the soap and shampoo, and the feel of them against your skin. Notice the sight of the water droplets on the walls or shower screen, the water dripping down your body and the steam rising upwards. Notice the movements of your arms as you wash or scrub or shampoo.

When thoughts arise, acknowledge them, let them be, and bring your attention back to the shower.

Again and again, your attention will wander. As soon as you realize this has happened, gently acknowledge it, note what distracted you, and bring your attention back to the shower.

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